The following post is authored by myself and appeared in the latest issue of Adoptioperheet’s magazine. Adoptioperheet is the association of adoptive families in Finland. Recently, they expanded their services and they offer some support and information also in English. You can join the English-speaking Facebook support group here.
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When my husband and I moved from Italy to Finland over seven years ago, little did we know our journey would lead us further to India through the adventure of international adoption.

We both were born and raised near Bologna, Italy. We had a chance to leave our home country and come live in the family-friendly Finland, and we grabbed it with no hesitation. Life was stressful in Italy and I felt out of place. After landing in Finland, my first instinct was to shake off my Italian identity, start from scratch, and focus on integrating in my new home country.

In 2013, our daughter was born and the need of teaching her Italian as a second language forced us close again to the local Italian expat community. Through my daughter’s eyes, I got to live again what it meant to be Italian and learned to be proud of it. Ironically, I became even more Italian than I used to be in Italy. Sometime, as I felt rejected, excluded, different or confused, it gives me a primitive comfort to go back to my roots. That’s the power birth culture can have on our souls.

E and R cuddling our guinea pigs.

When our girl turned one, we started the adoption process. By that time, we felt confident with our multicultural family identity and we sincerely believed in not severing our adopted child’s roots, but in including his heritage into our family. We committed to not changing his birth name, to learning the ways of his country, and to including some of its traditions into our daily family life.

Life led us to India as our adoption country. In a short time, we were matched to a perfect one year-old boy. In the months prior to our trip, I attended Indian cooking courses, connected with Indian families living in Finland, and tried to learn as much as I could about the wonderful country India is. During the past years, the Indian community in Finland has welcomed my family with open hearts. One Indian lady brought us children’s books from India; another friend curry leaves from her mother’s tree in Bangalore; an Indian colleague regularly advises me on festivals and traditions; fellow Indian mothers taught me how to care for my child’s hair and skin, how to cook Masala Dosa or celebrate Rakhi. I was afraid cultivating three cultures would set us apart, instead it opened the door into a wider community for us.

As expats ourselves, we strongly believe in the shaping force that languages and cultural heritages have. As adoptive parents, we honor the responsibility of cultivating our child’s roots. By embracing his cultural background, we are teaching him that diversity is something to value and not hide or suffocate in homogeneity. We were privileged, as our own experience taught us to appreciate it. Our son added this invaluable richness to our lives and we cannot be but deeply thankful.

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If you liked this post, you may enjoy also:
Our adoption story, chapter I
I am a culture juggler
The joy in adoption #adoptionilo